


Patrius Diei

by Daiya_Darko



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Angsty Schmoop, Father's Day, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-16
Updated: 2013-06-16
Packaged: 2017-12-15 04:10:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/845149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daiya_Darko/pseuds/Daiya_Darko
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Their first Father's Day in space - everyone handles it differently, some better than others.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Patrius Diei

**Author's Note:**

> Angsty thingy because happy father's day!! And talking to mine usually sets off my anxiety.

 

**Leonard**

He had been dreading this day. It was easier when he was still a student; he had summers off and he could fly back to Georgia to spend Father's day with Joanna and be mostly amicable with Pamela. 

This is his first Father's Day away from Jo, and if anyone can tell something's wrong, they're not making a big deal about it. Jim especially isn't, almost seems to forget what the day is at all. He claps Bones on the back and gives him a spitefully wide grin.

"What's crawled up your ass now?" Leonard retracts his previous assumption that Jim hadn't noticed - of course he did; the damn kid noticed everything.

"Nothing important, Captain," Leonard answers gruffly, moving away from Jim's touch.

Jim's smile falls immediately. "Bones, what's wrong?"

Leonard looks around at the bridge and motions toward the turbolift. In the relative privacy, he explains, "It's my first Father's Day away from home."

At first, Jim looks confused, and then it dawns on him. "Oh shit, Bones. I'm sorry. Do you wanna take off?"

"I just need an extended lunch break to make a call," Leonard explains, none too happily. He was doing so well with not letting personal things affect his work.

"Take the time you need," Jim squeezes his shoulder supportively. With an almost sad smile, he adds, "Happy Father's Day, Bones."

Leonard watches Jim walk away, and then feels like an asshole. He doesn't know why, but he pushes it to the back of his mind. He goes about his shift, working on as much as possible to accomodate for the extra hour he's giving himself. At the bells, Leonard doesn't even bother going to mess, and heads straight for his quarters.

If he got his timing right...

"Leonard?" Pam's face fills the vid screen with a surprised expression, and Leonard has to fight back a smirk.

"Yep."

"Oh my gosh! Hold on, I was just getting Jo ready for bed." She disappears for a minute, but when she returns, in her arms is one bright-eyed, bouncy seven-year-old missing a front tooth.

Leonard's heart fills with a swell of emotion at the sight of her in all her childish glory. "Hey there, pumpkin!"

"Happy father's day, daddy!" She exclaims, grinning with that gap-tooth smile.

"Thank you, darlin'," Leonard grins. "How many teeth have you lost? You're gonna be an old lady before me!"

Leonard lives for these moments, these times that he can almost forget his messy divorce, his mother's death, Nero, Khan, Jim dying. He wants to live in these precious-filled minutes and savor them to the last second. He doesn't care about anything else; he's doing this all for Joanna, ultimately. He tells her stories about what he's seen so far, occasionally making eye contact with Pam to indicate _, There's more to it than that, but PG._ Joanna listens, completely enamored until she's fighting to keep her eyes open on her mother's lap.

"Go on and get some sleep, baby. Daddy has to go back to work soon anyways."

"They make you work on Father's Day?"

Leonard chuckles. "Yes ma'm."

Jo pouts and yawns. "That's not fair. Tell the captain you're a good daddy and that takes preeceedence."

Both Leonard and Pamela laugh at her mispronounciation of "precedence," but don't bother to correct her. "Look at you and your big words. Keep up the good grades and I'll send you back a gift."

Joanna sits up with renewed energy. "Really?"

"Yep, but first you gotta go to bed."

"Okay," she drags out. "Goodnight, daddy. I love you!"

"I love you too, babygirl," Leonard says with a tear in his eye. He doesn't say anything to Pam's condescending eyeroll, but tells her bye as well. He's going to need a few minutes to compose himself; Joanna always manages to bring out his soft side. He loves being father, loves it more than practicing medicine. He'd easily die -

That asshole feeling hits him like a ton of bricks, and Leonard swears as he rubs his face with a tired hand.

_Did Jim ever even celebrate Father's Day?_

 

 

  
_  
_**Jim**

Jim isn't much for words, but when he is, he's all or nothing. He's good with words that don't have sensitive emotions behind them; words as a captain are different than words as a friend, a lover, or a son. He dreads that last one, because he had tried to hard to forget about it, at least until Bones reminded him.

Now he's sitting in this empty conference room because he does his best thinking in these and tries to draft up a message to send his mother. His words all fall flat and sound contrived, completely full of shit. They're captain words, not son words. He takes it to his quarters to try again - maybe not being in a place of work will help him figure out what to say.

Does he address it "Dear mom" or would "Mother" be more appropriate? Should he sign it "Love" or "Sincerely?"

Jim simply begins writing from his head and decides to push the unimportant details to the back of his mind.

_I almost forgot what today is, and then a friend reminded me. He's a dad, and it's his first father's day away from home. I felt bad for him and told him he could have the day off, but he only took an hour after lunch. He's a good dad. In some ways, he acts like he's mine - always getting on me about my studies in school, checking up on me when I'm sick, telling me when I'm being ornery. He's a doctor, but I think he's naturally just good at taking care of people. If I was ever going to let someone be a pseudo-father figure to me and openly admit it, I'd let it be him. He's loyal and competent, self-sacrificing and even when he's scared, fearless. He was a lot like dad, or what you and everyone else tells me he was like._

_Truth be told, I thought I would never know what it's like to have a dad, and then I got to thinking about how you were the one who taught me how to shave. You taught me how to tie a tie, polish my shoes, fix leaky pipes, mend my own underwear, start a fire, catch a fish and skin and cook it...you taught me those things. You taught me how to fight, and to never throw the first punch. You told me to make my fights clean and even. When it came to girls, you told me what to do and what not to do. You let every girl I brought home know she wasn't good enough for me, and even sometimes, I wasn't good enough for her. And I appreciate that more than you will ever know. I may not have always listened, but you still gave me a good, solid pop to the back of my head for it._

_You've been more of a father to me than anyone, than any stepdad or boyfriend or recruiter or friend. You've been there from the beginning. When I told you I was going to Starfleet, you didn't blink, just said, "Make me proud to be a Kirk again."_

_Well mama, I hope I have. Thank you for being there for me always.  
_

_Happy Father's Day._

_Love, Jim._

_  
_Jim sniffles a bit and fists away the tears in his eyes. He misses his mom, and he misses the feeling of someone caring for him unconditionally. Here, everyone would give their life for him if he asked him to, but few would volunteer, and even fewer would insist.

To Jim, that's always going to be a sign of fatherhood.

 

 

**Spock**

"Father, it has been brought to my attention that there is a human custom where father's are celebrated. I have taken time from my schedule to tell you thank you for your support in these trying times as of late."

Sarek gave no indication that he was aware of the holiday, but asked, "How are you feeling?"

The question caught Spock off-guard. "I am well, although I fail to see the importance of my current status."

"The point of a father, Spock, is to always care for his children and be concerned with their well-being. If you were unwell, I would be as well."

"I do not understand."

"Spend some time with your human friends, particularly the ones who are fathers. They might be able to explain it in a more...human way."

"I will do that, father. Live long and prosper."

"Peace and long life, my son."

Spock ends the call and reflects on the brief, albeit intriguing conversation he'd just had. Sarek had almost implied that fathers had a direct connection to their children, at least humans did. Did Spock's bi-racial heritage involve this? In humans, it almost seemed as though fathers were more distant from their children, leaving the mothers to do most of the child-rearing. It seemed that way in every culture. Thus, Spock also didn't see the importance in Father's Day. Nevertheless, he took Sarek's advice and sought out Dr. McCoy once they were both finished with their shifts.

"Doctor, may I have a word?"

McCoy shows obvious signs of discomfort, but a tiredness in his shoulders suggests he is too exhausted to fight. "What's on your mind, Spock?"

As they walk down the corridor to mess, Spock tries to carefully parse his words. "I spoke with my father today. He said something I was not clear of, but he told me to ask someone who is a father and is human. I assume he did this for my benefit as a being of two species."

McCoy frowns. "How did you - "

"All personnel with families are listed as such. In the event of a tragedy, it is Starfleet regulation to - "

"I know, I know! What's your question?" McCoy rushes, waving a hand in dismissal.

Spock pauses. "My father said that a father should always care and be concerned for his children. However, I have seen it demonstrated in multiple species, including  humans especially, that this is not the case. There are many single mothers and men who must be brought to court to help raise their child."

"Those men are scum. They're the worst kind of people you'd ever meet. But they're just the noisy minority, Spock. Most of us give a damn about our kids and obviously Jim's daddy saw fit to sacrifice his life before he even got to see Jim. So yeah, some men are idiots who don't know the blessing they've been given, and others, like me, would cry if they saw their child crying."

"Have you cried over your child many times, doctor?"

McCoy scoffs. "I was crying this afternoon after my lunch break just from getting to talk to her."

Spock's gaze softens with understanding. "I feel I have misjudged you, doctor. You have a great amount of love inside of you."

"Sometimes love is expressed in anger, Spock. Don't forget that when you see me yelling at Jim." He shakes his head, but his face is relaxed. "Lord knows he needs someone to tell him about himself."

Spock hesitates as the step through the mess door, then asks, "Could you elaborate on that over dinner?" To his surprise, McCoy agrees, seemingly giddy at the chance to educate Spock on something he has a fundamental understanding of but needs cultural context for. He decides to let McCoy have his cake and eat it too, so to speak.

 

 

**Uhura**

"Your sister just became licensed to open her own practice. She's going to be a pediatrician, Nyota."

With well-practiced sweetness, Uhura replies, "Tell Makena I'm proud of her. I always knew she had it in her."

"Kamau moved to Europe to help the families of the dead and injured get their legal claims processed. Your brother and sister are always doing so much good for others."

Uhura forces a smile, when what she really wants to say is, " _I_ do good for others too, papa. Twice my language skills have saved lives; does that mean nothing to you?" What she eventually says is, "Good. Starfleet could use someone as talented with the law on their side."

"No," Alhamisi nearly spits. "I won't have another child claimed by Starfleet. That's just military waiting to happen, Nyota. You're smarter than this. You've almost died twice, and did you consider either time what it would have done to our family?"

"I'm not sure," she snaps. "With the way you blow off my accomplishments and keep praising Makena and Kamau, I couldn't tell you'd actually miss me!"

Alhamisi falls silent, a grim look falling of her his face. "You are a spoiled girl. You've been around those  _mzungu_ for too long. How dare you say I do not care about you?"

Nyota sighs, rubbing her temple with her hand. "I'm sorry, papa. I didn't mean that. I'm just stressed here."

"You should never have left.  _Chui anazaa ngawa,"_ he grumbles before disconnecting.

Those words shouldn't echo in Uhura's head, and yet they do. She's heard it before, many times, as the saying isn't new, but it's the first time it's been said to her. Fighting back tears, she comms Sulu to see how his obligatory father's day call went. She prays it was better than his.

 

 

**Sulu**

"Moshi moshi?"

"Karu-niichan!"

Sulu smiles at his sister warmly. "I was hoping to catch dad."

"Ugh," she rolls her eyes dramatically. "They're fighting right now."

"Again? Why?"

"Because of you," Aiko says in a bored tone, looking at her nails.

"Hey, look at me," Sulu says in his "I have a higher rank than you" voice. Aiko glances up. "What are they saying?"

"Hikaru, you know I don't speak as well as you do, and they're talking really fast. I think dad said something about you being gone for five years and abandoning us."

Sulu sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Is he really still on about that?"

"Hai. Mom said you were saving the universe, so it's okay if you're a bit M.I.A. for births and weddings."

"Are you getting married? Are you pregnant?" Sulu breaks out into a sweat at the thought of his baby sister even touching a man who isn't family and reaches for his sword.

"Wow, you're so stupid, Hikaru. Of course I'm neither; I'm seventeen, you dick. Can I wait to get my BA first?"

Sulu grumbles, "You'd better. Put dad on the line if you can."

Aiko looks doubtful, but then she's gone and Hikaru can faintly hear high-pitched yelling and then a lower voice growling. Aiko is shouting something, but Sulu isn't sure what. She returns with a frown and explains, "Dad said he doesn't want to talk to you unless it's face to face like a man. Mom said he was being stubborn and she loves and misses you."

Sulu tries to hide his hurt. "Thanks. I promise I'll be back when you graduate from college, alright?"

Aiko winks and makes a gun at him. "I'm gonna hold you to that promise and kick your ass in kendo if you break it."

"You're on," Sulu chuckles, ending the call. Just then, his PADD beeps, and he sees a short message from Uhura:  _I've had better. You?_

_I've definitely had better. Drinks?_

In five minutes, Uhura is there and on his bed, boots off as she cries into her plum wine. Sulu holds her, rubbing her back comfortingly as she complains about her dad not being impressed with her.

"He called me a 'disappointment!' Hikaru, have I ever performed below my abilities?"

Sulu shakes his head. "You've always exceeded the expectations. Above par. 10/10, would promote."

Uhura laughs into her glass, leaning further into him. "I'm just so sick of living in their shadows. I'm not even the youngest, but Kamau gets all the attention if Makena isn't!"

"Ah, the plight of the middle child. Fortunately, I'm just the oldest, so everything I do is criticized while my sister gets away with a crap load."

"Oh yeah, how'd that go?"

"I couldn't even speak to him. Apparently I called while my parents were fighting about me and Aiko answered. I tried to get her to go get dad, but he said he didn't want to speak to me unless it was face to face." Sulu doesn't realize there are tears streaming down his face until Uhura's wiping them away, replacing the streaks with gentle kisses.

"He'll see the light soon. A father doesn't just abandon his child out of nowhere because of one decision he doesn't agree with. He'll come around, Hikaru."

"Thanks, Nyota," Sulu smiles weakly and sighs. "I hope Pavel's having a better day than us."

 

 

**Chekov**

Talks with Andrei are always hard on Chekov. His father expects so much from him, and even though he always meets those expectations, he feels an emotional toll. He has to keep up his hardwork; he has to make it worthwhile that the money they could have spent saving Chekov's mother was spent on his education instead. Everything he does is in her memory now, because all that money could have at least bought her a funeral plot.

Instead she sits on the mantel in a dull urn.

Chekov tries to swallow his guilt at lying to his father -  _Yes, I have made many friends. Yes, people are nice to me. Yes, I've made interesting new discoveries. No, I'm not lonely._

 _  
_The truth is, Chekov hasn't stopped being lonely for a second. He distracts himself with work and socializing in order to ignore the longing for familiarity and companionship. Sulu has always made it known that Chekov is welcome any time he likes, but Chekov fears being a burden.

He suspects the loneliness is just from speaking to his father so often. Without Anna to keep him company, Andrei turned to Chekov for sole comfort. Chekov doesn't mind, not really, but soon work will overwhelm him and he won't have the time to entertain his father. Because of that, Chekov feels like a bad son, even though Andrei constantly tells him, "You are a blessing. I am so proud of you, Pasha. Your mother would be too."

It's way too much pressure on Chekov. He used to only regret being a young genius occasionally, but now he feels it after every phone call with his father. 

There's a second kind of guilt, and it comes from finding a less stressful father figure in someone else.

 

 

**Scotty**

"Da?"

"Monty?"

"How are ya?"

"Just tryin' to get this god-forsaken telly to work," Scotty Sr. gripes. "It's a load of shite, I tell ya!"

"Da, don't - no, don't bang it, for crissakes. Where's Robert? 'Ave him take a look."

"Yer brother's at the pub with Clara and they probably won't be back until past my programs!"

Scotty hides a laugh with a cough behind his fist, but still maintains his smile. He'll never be really annoyed with watching his father curse technology. It's endearing, really. He just wishes his siblings weren't getting pissed and were at home with mum and dad, but they're grown adults - they all know what they're doing, more or less. And in any case, this just means around Christmas time, when dad starts complaining about things, Scotty will be exempt for "at least 'avin the damn decency to call while out in the black while you two were getting drunk watching the Blacks."

Every Father's Day for Scotty just means another glimpse into his possible future. No kids, because his one true love will rest among the stars, but enough nieces and nephews to keep him busy, thanks to Arlyne.

As he enjoys the quiet that befalls his quarters once more, a chime rings, and Scotty starts with some confusion.

"Mister Scott?"

Scotty opens the door with a surprised look. "Laddie, what can I do for you?"

"I just wanted to stop by and wish you a happy Father's Day. Was I interrupting?" Chekov looks ready to bolt, so Scotty ushers him in.

"No no, I just got off a call with my dad a few minutes ago. Good timing. I must know, however, why you're wishing me a happy Father's Day. I'm not a dad, at least that I know of." Scotty stares off in the distance as he tries to tally up a list of possible mothers when Chekov interrupts him.

"No sir, it is just that...I am very close to my father and being away from him so long...you have almost come to be a father figure to me. Thank you."

Scotty tries to hide the look of pride and shock on his face, and ends up just hugging Chekov. "You're a good lad, you know that?"

"I know," Chekov starts before his voice tapers into a whine. His fists clutch to Scotty's shirt, and he can feel the tears seep through. It tugs at Scotty's heartstrings to see the boy so broken up over something, but he's glad Chekov felt he could come to him. Rubbing his back in small circles, Scotty asks quietly, "What's all this about?"

"I feel as if I am betraying my father right now, but he expects so much from me after my mother died. I don't want to disappoint him, but I can't be there for him all the time."

"Pavel, listen," Scotty lifts Chekov's face from his shoulder, "Your father will always be the most proud man in the universe because he has you for a son. And it doesn't matter if you never discover an easy form of time travel or save a species. It doesn't matter if you chart an entire star system by yourself. You're his baby boy, and he will love you and understand if you get too busy for calls. And me? There's nothing wrong with having two dads, now is there?"

Chekov hiccups and wipes his eyes. "No sir."

"Then don't worry! You love your dad, right?"

"Yes."

"Then that's all that counts." Scotty narrows his eyes and holds Chekov at arms length. "You're not trying to get me to be a, you know..." he struggles for the right word. "Sugar daddy or somethin' like that are ya?"

Laughing, Chekov shakes his head. "No sir, I am not into that and I certainly wouldn't come to you for it."

"Oh good," Scotty feigns wiping sweat from his brow and exhaling in relief. "Then you can view me as a father all you like."


End file.
